Friday, November 19, 2010

Women, Use Your Power to Uplift Each Other!

A recent conversation with my mom encouraged me to do my part in uplifting other women. We were discussing the most recent result of her own journey to uplift other women, where she saw the fruits of her labor.  About a week ago, she gave a very sincere compliment to a close friend.  My mother remarked at how good her friend looked in a certain pair of jeans and suggested they should be worn more often.  Her friend dismissed the compliment and even complained at how large her backside looked.  But (no pun intended) during a recent gathering, my mom saw this friend sporting the same jeans!  Only this time, her friend strutted with confidence and even had a little wiggle in her step.  What a difference one statement can make!

This is an example of the influence that women have in the lives of other women.  We can choose to be spiteful, gossipy, envious, and tear each other down OR take steps to appreciate, value, compliment, and build up our fellow sisters.

Here are a few tips to that will help you influence another woman in a positive way:

Give her a sincere compliment
If you see a fellow sister wearing some cute shoes, sporting a funky haircut, or having glowing skin...TELL HER! Compliments are meant to be given and not hidden.  You would be surprised at how life-changing a few words can be.

Be able to accept a compliment
When we see our mothers, sisters, and aunts denying compliments we tend to do the same.  So, choose to be a better role model and learn to receive compliments.  Stop saying, "This old thing?" or "You are just saying that because you're my friend".  Instead, say "Thank you for noticing" and return the favor to someone else.

Stand up to gossip
If you are present when someone is being catty and degrading another woman, stand up for her! Inform them that you will not take part in the verbal assault.  Or mention something positive, something that you admire about her.    

Help the little sisters
Daughters, younger sisters, and other young women we encounter daily are in desperate need of sisterhood.  Lead by example and teach them that other women are not the enemy.  Instead of being competition minded (i.e., for male affection and attention) encourage them to be confidence minded.  When we build self-esteem in others, our own self-esteem increases.  And a boost in self-esteem can make us more attractive to potential dating partners and friends.

Start on your own journey to improve the lives of other women and let me know how it goes...         


  1. We may forget what a person said but we rarely forget how they made us FEEL. Let's look for the good in others and tell that person.

  2. Words of wisdom from the one who started it all. Thanks mom!

  3. Women seem to be a difficult group. I must admit I have gotten caught up in a show that makes women look like a very insecure group--basketball wives. It's amazing to me that even in the 30's these women are still acting like they are in high school. I was looking forward to my friendships at thirty, but if all I have to look forward to is the same things (gossip, bullying, and jealousy) I thought I left behind in high school I may be just one lonely girl. Maybe the cast of basketball wives need to take some empowerment classes, because they have a whole lot of insecure girls following their actions.

  4. Anonymous....I too have witnessed the cattiness that occurs on that show and others. While we view shows such as this as "harmless entertainment" we forget just how powerful negativity can be, especially for those who are easily influenced. Obviously you are an example of what this post is all about. Thanks for your comment!