Would you tell your partner that you had an affair?
In a recent study on infidelity:
-Women are more likely to admit
-Women are more likely to end a relationship after they are unfaithful
-Women are more likely to begin a relationship with the person they had an affair with
-Men on average have more affairs than women
Some say honesty is the best policy while others think confessions are only good for the guilty. Do people admit affairs to repair their relationships and gain forgiveness from their partners or do they admit affairs to clear their own conscience?
The reasons why people admit affair are varied and depend on many different motives:
Regret - ashamed of behavior and confess out of
obligation to partner
Absolution - to forgive themselves some need forgiveness from their partner
Discontent - due to misery, confession is given
hoping that relationship will end
Fear - admission due to anxiety that the truth will
Yet, there are reasons why people choose to keep an affair secret:
Worry- admission may end the relationship so some
Indifference - not caring whether relationship lasts or
not, but silence keeps the peace
Fear - information about affair may cause partner to
seek revenge and have an affair themselves
Status Quo- keep quiet because conflict resulting from
admission is undesirable
History - it is not worth it to admit a one-time mistake
that will not happen again
In the end, is it better to tell the truth?
Would you rather your partner tell you about an affair or keep it a secret?
Source: Brand, R. J., Markey, C. M., Mills, A. & Hodges, S. D. (2007) Sex differences in self-reported infidelity and it correlates. Sex Roles, 57, 101-109.