Deal-breakers are those things (character traits, lifestyle choices, behavior, etc.) in a relationship that can end the relationship. Some people have very specific deal-breakers and others have general ways of evaluating whether or not they will continue a relationship.
Common relationship deal-breakers:
- Domestic violence
- Infidelity
- Change in sexual orientation
- Criminal activity
- Substance abuse
- Poor financial habits
- Dishonesty
- Undesirable personality traits
- i.e., anger, jealousy, uncleanliness, conceit, etc.
It is a good idea to know your deal-breakers BEFORE entering into a relationship. Upon meeting a potential mate, stick to your deal-breakers and DO NOT excuse them or assume your mate will eventually change.
Steps to identifying your own relationship deal-breakers:
Make a list
Write down all the things you can think of that you CANNOT tolerate in a
relationship. This may take some time as it requires thinking of situations
that you have and have not experienced. Get inspired by others using
situations from friends and family, and examples from the media.
Revise your list
Most of us have just a few true deal-breakers. The rest of our lists would
include dislikes, or traits we would rather not have to deal with. But
remember that authentic relationships require work. Our loved ones have
flaws, as do we, therefore many unwanted behaviors will not be deal-
breakers.
Follow your list
Accepting or ignoring deal-breakers will inevitably lead to relationship
dissatisfaction. No relationship is worth overlooking your deal-breakers
no matter how attractive, nice, or attentive a someone may be.
If you have already established your deal-breakers, please comment and let us know what they are.