Is There An Age When You Should Be Married?

Many 30 somethings feel pressure from society, family, and friends to explain why they are not yet married.  Do the same pressures to get married exist for adults in 2010 that existed for those in 1900? If so, where do they come from?


According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the median age at first marriage in:

• 1900 was 25.9 for men & 21.9 for women
• 1950 was 22.8 for (m) & 20.3 for (w)
• 1990 was 26.1 for (m) & 23.9 for (w)
• 1995 was 26.9 for (m) & 24.5 for (w)
• 2000 was 26.8 for (m) & 25.1 for (w)
• 2008 was 27.6 for (m) & 25.9 for (w)

The numbers show that men and women are getting married later in life as time goes on.  While some are postponing marriage for many reasons (career, education, freedom, etc.) others still feel pressure to be married by a certain age.

Research on attitudes about marriage show that young people view marriage as important and most of them expect to get married.  

In fact, 83% of 20-24 year-olds expect to get married at some point with almost half expecting to marry within 10 years.  

Apparently, the ideals of young adults reinforce the expectation that people should be married during their 30s.     

Source: Young Adult Attitudes About Relationships and Marriage

Your Sexual Behaviors May Not Keep You Safe

According to the Centers for Disease Control (2008):
     19 million STD cases each year, almost 50% are in people aged 15-24
     Chlamydia and gonorrhea are most commonly reported
     Syphilis (virtually absent 10 years ago) is on the rise
     Despite vaccine, human papillomavirus (HPV) rates increasing in those 18-59
     
Engaging in risky behaviors (i.e., improper use or no use of contraceptives, multiple sex partners) increases risk for contracting a STD.  Although, people who practice "safer" sex may be at an even greater risk as a result of their partners behavior.  Researchers report that partner sexual behavior is a bigger predictor of STD risk than individual behavior. 


Partner characteristics that increase STD risk:

• Marijuana and alcohol use
• Age difference of 5 years (older or younger)
• History of jail/imprisonment
• Other sexual partners in the past year
• Having an STD in the past year

The more of the above characteristics, the higher risk for STDs.  Participants whose partners had all five were 3 times more likely to have an STD.  Overall, having an STD and age difference were the biggest predictors of STD risk.  


If you practice "safer" sex and are in a monogamous relationship, you may still be at risk, especially if your partner a) falls in the above categories & b) is dishonest about his/her behaviors.


Source: Partner Behavior and STD Risk

Nursery University

Navigating all of the things associated with education (cost, admission, recommendations, entrance exams) can be a nightmare for both parents and students.  It is a process that many prepare for well in advance...starting with preschool enrollment.  Choosing where to go, how much it costs, and how to get in are decisions that can be more difficult than admission into an ivy league university.


This documentary follows the process some parents encounter enrolling their children into exclusive and costly nursery schools.      

Men You Should NOT Date

We are often blind-sighted by our perception of a potential mate.  Certain characteristics like a nice smile, attractive face, or muscular build may mask warning signals telling us to run.  Instincts make up our biological protection system, giving clues some (especially women) often ignore.  For those of you who desire an authentic relationship with a man,  listen to your instincts and avoid the following:

 

Casanova

"I LOVE women!"  Of course we want a guy who has respect and admiration for the fairer sex.  But that statement goes a bit farther.  It is the same as women who LOVE shoes, meaning many different kinds of shoes, not just one pair.  This man LOVES women, all women and may have multiple cell phones and aliases.

Work Horse

There is nothing sexier than a hard-working man.  The problem arises when work is his only priority.  The work horse won't have time to devote to a relationship and will cancel plans regardless of preparation.  Although he's probably a good guy, work/career comes first so the timing is off.

Rebel Without a Cause

Many women want the bad boy.  Riding a motorcycle, teetering on the edge and having a slightly smug disposition can be alluring.  Everyone makes mistakes and you can be forgiving to a degree.  But a man with a long history of crime and lawlessness will expect you to be the Bonnie to his Clyde. 

Serial Monogamist

Men who move from one relationship to the next are good because at least they can commit, right?  Wrong.  Yes they can commit, but a) taking little time in-between relationships means little to no closure and b) moving on quickly means they keep their options open while in relationships.

Double-dealer

If you "took" a man from another woman, then another woman can "take" him from you.  Patterns of behavior are hard to break especially if they are accepted by your partner.  The double-dealer rarely commits to one woman, but if you pay attention he will reveal his cards.

 

Captain Cavalier

The captain is focused on himself and himself only.  He boasts about his salary, past relationships, accomplishments, etc. and may talk in the 3rd person.  This guy will rarely ask questions about you and only appears interested if it suits him.